The Toxic Fandom Extravaganza ft. The Timmies

(i only wrote the parts that include the tulpas)

Once upon a time, there lived three timmies; Marx Timmy, Kanan Timmy and Anime Timmy. They had many things in common aside from sharing a name, one of which was that they all wrote pages about fandoms for things they personally dislike.

Our story begins with Marx Timmy, a young boy on his computer, rapidly typing away at his keyboard, the device making clack noises as his fingers made contact with every key they touched. His unnamed mother, a presumably divorced woman, yells to him from the kitchen in an attempt to get his attention. A now-distracted Marx Timmy hollers back at his mother with malice. "Leave me alone, Mom!" he begins, "I'm trying to tell people on the internet that they're liking things wrong!" he goes back to typing his manifesto. Marx Timmy's mother tries yelling to him again, telling him to do his homework. Marx Timmy grows angrier. "MOOOOM!" he whines, "Lemme rant about people liking Blastoise and Charizard instead of Venusaur!" Marx Timmy was always one to get upset when people didn't have the same beliefs as him, as did the other Timmies. "This is why Dad left..." the woman mutters to herself. Marx Timmy, somehow hearing this, shouts back at her, "I don't care about dad! He liked Ronnie more than Lincoln!"

After taking a deep breath, Marx Timmy continued, "HE ALSO SAYS THAT YOSHI COMMITED TAX FRAUD! HE DIDN'T! HE JUST WANTED EXEMPTION!" Marx Timmy begins to melt while repeating "HE DIDN'T!" over and over to try and prove his point, eventually devolving into gibberish as he turns to liquid.

Enter Kanan Timmy, a young boy who lived in a small house next to Marx Timmy, who he has known since they were in diapers. His mom wanted him to start his homework as well. Kanan Timmy tells her to shut up, as he is busy arguing with Ronnie Anne fans online. Kanan Timmy really doesn't like Ronnie Anne.

Back at Marx Timmy's house, his mom, now with a pounding headache, overheard her son's suffering, remarking she should've gotten an abortion while she had the chance. Kanan Timmy randomly appears in the house as Marx Timmy begins to bubble. Rika RNW shows up and tells Kanan Timmy she likes Ronnie Anne, and Kanan Timmy responds by calling Rika a "toxic bitch". Poison Balloon says he likes her too. Poison Balloon has good taste.

Marx Timmy's remains possess his mom. YES SERIOUSLY!! Kanan Timmy tells everyone Ronnie Anne called his dad slurs and killed him, threatened to cut off his leg if she ever saw him in public and on top of that, SHE PISSED ON HIS FUCKING WIFE! Marx Timmy swears vengeance on all the Jiminy Cricket fans as Kanan Timmy gives his own moon speech. SNAPCUUUUUUUBE

Marx Timmy's mother laments about his brother moving out due to being unable to hand the antics of him, despite being only 3. Ronnie Anne comes in and confirms that she did in fact piss on Kanan Timmy's wife. Kanan Timmy screams at her.

writing the rest later my arms fucking HURT