User blog:Moon Snail/Why I hate "Adventure Time".

I'm sure many of you are wondering many things about me. Such as "What is your real name?", "Where did your username come from?", "You were never a snail. Why is your name 'Moon Snail'?", "Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?", "Who cares about your projects?", "Why do you have so many projects?" and "When's the next Tales from the Tooniverse anyway?".

However, there is one question that probably EVERYONE is wonderig. One question that has been a mystery ever since it was brought up. One question to top it all off.

"Why do you hate Adventure Time?"

As you may know, I hate Adventure Time more than anything else. But why? What is so bad about it? Well, here's why. You will finally get the answers.

I am so gonna regret this entire blog... Probably more than my "No Swearing" and "I'm done with my hiatus" blogs...

Reason 1. Forced Funniness
As you may know, Adventure Time is a cartoon. So of course, it needs Comedy. Sadly, this comedy falls flat. On a pit of metal spikes. In Summer. at 500 MPH. With Asian Giant Hornets stinging it on the way down. While viewing DeviantArt's Quicksand side. While choking on- *Slap* Ow!

Anyway, the Jokes in Adventure time are always unfunny, and they are usually there just to be funny. That's not good. You should build up the joke. You need to fit it in with the situation. Don't shoehorn in a joke because you want the audience to laugh sooner. Even the other shows I don't like have some funniness. Take Regular show for an example (Might be innacurate):

Mordecai: Dude, check out what you got in the mail!

Rigby: All right! What is it?

Mordecai: *Punches the box open and then continues the punch into Rigby*

That was properly built up and silly. It's also used for a pure-comedy show. Adventure time is not a Pure-comedy show.

Reason 2: Horrible Character design.
Seriously, the characters either look silly (Finn, Ice King, Marceline) or downright ugly (Jake, Gunter). It also uses, and probably created, Noodle arms. I HATE noodle arms. Probably my third least favorite cliche, only beaten by Double Standards and Suprise Final Boss. Seriously, it's not too hard to attach some f**king limbs to your characters! I almost never use Noodle arms, unless it's satire.

Reason 3: Poor at best graphics
I can explain the graphics as "Problem Solverz with thicker outlines and the occasional shading". As an artist, I can recommend ONE thing: One line of shading can make your art a lot better. Adventure Time rarely ever uses shading. Not even for the backgrounds. If this was the 90s, this would be excusable. But this is the 2nd millenium, get your head out of the past!

Reason 4: Hard to follow storyline.
If you pick a later episode, you'll probably be confused. Okay, that's a trait for a lot of good shows (Doctor Who, Avatar, Once upon a Time), but still. And the storyline makes NO SENSE. It just goes all over the place! Ugh!

And the biggest reason why I hate this abomination of a cartoon?

Reason 5: The show is made on f**king drugs!
I have hated Adventure Time from the very beginning, all because of this one single reason. This show is powered on drugs. The characters, the story line, the events, all of it! This show is very often wierd, creepy, disturbing or gross.

"If you hate it because it's wierd, then why are you here on RNW?"

Well, RNW is the "Good" kind of wierd. Adventure time is the "Bad" kind of wierd. There's a huge difference.

Closing note
And that's why I hate Adventure Time. The three-year long mystery is solved. Did I not change your opinion? That's okay, we all have out opinions. Do you hate Adventure time now? Nice to know. Were you offended by this list? I don't care, unless you express the pain in your bowels to me.

I'm Moon Snail, and this has been a blog!

I'm out!