Infomercial Parody 1


 * THE TIME WASTER

Ever feel like infomercials are just plain ridiculous? They are! This is an example. This one should take 1 minute. Maybe 2 minutes. Or 3 minutes. Possibly 4 minutes. Perhaps 5 hours. Either way, this infomercial is the ultimate time waster! For watching this, you must pay $39.95. Plus $6,835.43 processing and handling. Plus $635,456,903.13 shipping and handling. Ironically, there is nothing to process, handle, and ship. Did I say handle? If not, I'll just say it again. Process, ship, and handle. Actually, I meant ship, handle, or process. So I'll just say it again. The right way. Is that okay? No? Well, you know. Whatever. I'm still saying it. Ironically, there is nothing to ship, handle, or process. You're still gonna pay. You're still gonna pay us money. CALL 5-555-555-5555 NOW TO PAY A BUNCH OF MONEY! THAT'S WHAT INFOMERCIALS ARE FOR, EH? WHAT? ANYTHING? ANYONE? UP TOP! I WANT PEOPLE HERE NOW. I'LL GIVE YOU 30 SECONDS. 30, 29, 28, 27, 26, 25, 24, 23, 22, 21, 20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. NO ONE PAID. THIS JUST WASTED MY TIME. THAT'S WHY THIS IS KNOWN AS THE TIME WASTER.