Randonese

Rex and Ren are standing in a room.

Rex: Hello! Today we will teach you...

Ren and Rex: RANDONESE!!!!!!

Ren: You may be wondering what it is. Look at this!

Rex: Mesa watchin' Avaturd.

Ren: See? OK, first lesson. Instead of saying 'I am', say 'Mesa'

EXAMPLE

Mom: REX!

Rex: YEAH MOM? MESA WATCHING TV!

Ren: When you see 'ar', 'ard' or 'erd', replace it with 'turd'!

EXAMPLE

Rex: This movie sucks.

Ren: What movie is it?

Rex: Avaturd.

Ren: Oh.

Ren: If you want to say 'the', say 'da' if it is before a word that starts with a consonant and 'teh' if it's before a vowel.

EXAMPLE

Rex: Where's da remote? I want to change da channel!

Rex: I dunno, what do I look like, teh automatic remote tracker?

Ren: When you say 'that' or 'what', say 'tat' and 'wat'!

EXAMPLE

Ren: HSHWGSDHEGFYGDCVBDFG

Rex: Wat da heck?

Ren: Tat stupid movie is messing me up!

Ren: If you want to say 'my', say meh.

Ren: If you want to say a word with 'u' as in stupid or 'o' as in movie, use 'oo'.

EXAMPLE

Rex: I HATE THIS STOOPID MOOVIE!

(To be continued)